I am a slave

So my school got this fruit and vegetable grant which is totally awesome because it exposes our students to foods they necessarily wouldn’t ever get, and, it provides us all with a nice healthy snack three days a week.  Last year we got the normal fruits and veggies along with things like starfruit, uglyfruit, edamame, and purple carrots.  I love it (because I like snacks and snacking) and I love when there’s extra to take home!  Yesterday was carrots- regular baby carrots… except these baby carrots were like an inch in diameter, much like that of a cigar.  Do you know where this story is going yet?  Before eating, a few of our kids were ‘smoking’ their carrots.  If I were allowed to post pictures of them on the internet I would… but picture… an 8 year old, leaning back in his plastic chair, eyes closed and puffing on a carrot.  Seems like they watch Mad Men.

 mad men smoking

Mad Men when are you coming back!?!?!?!? Is a year off not enough for you people??? All you do is sit around and smoke and drink all day. 

Yesterday I was directed to a new website by my friend Roz, who sent me this article:

http://christwire.org/2010/10/are-your-cats-keeping-you-single/

Basically, what I got from reading it, was that women who have cats become social recluses because they don’ t know how to interact with humans.  Having a cat questions devotion to God, because humans are supposed to be dominant… but are actually slaves, yes- slaves, to cats’ whims and fancies.  This is because cats contribute nothing in terms of service and cats willfully damage their environment, like tearing up toilet paper.  Dang.   Oh, and it’s not any better for men owning cats either.  I think if you live alone, you CANNOT have a cat.  Because they’re terrible.

I had no idea that becoming a cat owner would make me a slave.  Although…. when I think about it,  Derby is a huge B sometimes, and quite honestly, selfish. 

derby3

And after reading the “cats are terrible” article, I was directed to this:

http://christwire.org/2010/04/do-gay-pets-go-to-heaven/

So, if you have a gay pet or are worried about your gay pet going to heaven, you might be interested in this.  Apparently not all dogs go to heaven.  Aaaaaaaaaaand this directed me to

http://christwire.org/2010/08/is-my-husband-gay/

Lots of good reading for a Friday.  The articles just get more and more ridiculous as you keep clicking.

Happy Friday!

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